"SCIENTIFIC PHRASES" = Common phrases



"IT HAS LONG BEEN KNOWN" = I didn't look up the original reference. 

"A DEFINITE TREND IS EVIDENT" = These data are practically meaningless. 

"WHILE IT HAS NOT BEEN POSSIBLE TO PROVIDE DEFINITE ANSWERSTO THE QUESTIONS" = An unsuccessful experiment but I still hope to get it published. 

"THREE OF THE SAMPLES WERE CHOSEN FOR DETAILED STUDY" = The other results didn't make any sense. 

"TYPICAL RESULTS ARE SHOWN" = This is the prettiest graph. 

"THESE RESULTS WILL BE IN A SUBSEQUENT REPORT" = I might get around to this sometime, if pushed/funded. 

"IN MY EXPERIENCE" = Once. 

"IN CASE AFTER CASE" = Twice. 

"IN A SERIES OF CASES" = Thrice. 

"IT IS BELIEVED THAT" = I think. 

"IT IS GENERALLY BELIEVED THAT" = A couple of others think so, too. 

"CORRECT WITHIN AN ORDER OF MAGNITUDE"  = Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. 

"ACCORDING TO STATISTICAL ANALYSIS" = Rumour has it. 

"A STATISTICALLY-ORIENTED PROJECTION OF THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THESE FINDINGS" = A really wild guess. 

"A CAREFUL ANALYSIS OF OBTAINABLE DATA" = Three pages of notes were obliterated when I knocked over a beer glass. 

"IT IS CLEAR THAT MUCH ADDITIONAL WORK WILL BE REQUIRED BEFORE A COMPLETE UNDERSTANDING OF THIS PHENOMENON OCCURS" = I don't understand it, and I never will. 

"AFTER ADDITIONAL STUDY BY MY COLLEAGUES" = They don't understand it either. 

"A HIGHLY SIGNIFICANT AREA FOR EXPLORATORY STUDY" = A totally useless topic selected by my committee. 

"IT IS HOPED THAT THIS STUDY WILL STIMULATE FURTHER INVESTIGATION IN THIS FIELD" = I am pleased to feed you bullshit.